Something you may or may not know about me: I am in the high risk category, and so I have been in isolation at
home for the last two weeks with no in-person human contact. This is due to a) my age: 60; and b) my health:
pre-diabetes, compromised lungs from asthma and mold exposure, liver disease, and a compromised immune
system. Now, to put your fears at rest, with my doctor's help all of these conditions are under
control. But it seems to me that if I were to catch this thing I’d be pretty
sick, pretty quick.
Positive things:
- It’s much harder to get
the sugar (ice cream) and the deadly sugar/caffeine combo (Pepsi) that
I’ve been fighting with giving up for years (psychological issue; we can talk about that later), so I’m looking at forced
withdrawals. This is a good thing, and thankfully, I hadn’t been hitting the Pepsi much at all
lately, so the caffeine withdrawal is barely noticeable and is more energy-related than headaches and such. Maybe by the end of this my
A1C (how we track diabetes) will be down in the not-even-diabetic-at-all area.
That would be wonderful!
- I’m choosing to look on
this time as a time to get closer to God through Bible
reading and discussion with Beth (we're in Philippians right now), online church, and helpful Christian books. If you have a good Bible study you'd recommend, please advise. My friend Debra told me about one called Bible Recap that has an app and a chat room for discussion. I'll be looking into that as well.
- Beth is making sure to contact me often and we are video chatting to play games and so I can talk to the kids. I'd love to chat, video stream, or get on a phone call with any of you who are willing. A friend I met through my former choir contacted me on Marco Polo (a video app) and we’ve been exchanging videos. So much fun! I'm on Skype. Text or PM me for details.
- I have had to realize that the helper person that I have always been, taking care of others, is now the one who needs to be cared for. This is a really difficult concept for me! I will eventually need to ask someone to shop for me, because the online delivery options seem to be overwhelmed at this point. I will be asking my daughters and possibly others for help in this. (Deep breaths!) Did I mention it’s difficult for me to ask for help…? ☹ New lessons every day in humility.
- It is so awesome that I
am able to work from home! I appreciate Intellectual Ventures more than I can say. And working (virtually/remotely) alongside and in support of some of the people who are helping to track and stop this virus is the best!
A couple of the above things may look like a lot of hard work, but believe me, the growth and humility they will bring are worth the process. It has been my pattern in the past that I don’t tend to do well when I am
alone for long periods of time. I guess I’m more extroverted than I thought…but as Beth reminded me the other day: I can do ALL THINGS through Christ, who strengthens me! And I also struggle with depression, and sometimes things get away from me. I've found Wednesdays to be especially hard lately (weird, I know!).
I have many beloved friends who are affected by this virus; some are in the hospital,and some are under home quarantine. It's so important for people to just stay home so we can get this thing under control before the illness overwhelms our medical resources. I don't like the fact that if and when I have to go out, I am actually watching for other people so I can avoid them. Taking the garbage out has become a calculated risk, because I live in an apartment building with internal hallways (like a hotel), so I have to check to make sure there's no one else in the hall before I commit. And we have security doors, so I had to have Safeway deliver there, instead of to my door. And I wait until they're gone before I collect my groceries, hoping no one else comes along during that time. You may think this is extreme, but I will not risk my life just to take the garbage out or get groceries. I hope you know that if someone were in trouble, that would be a different thing altogether, and I wouldn't hesitate to help.
I hope I am wrong in my understanding that it's going to be months before we can begin anything resembling normal functioning. I hope and pray that this thing blows over quickly, in a miraculous manner. But from what I am reading I don't think it will be over any time soon. I have spoken with a couple of people at work, at the Institute for Disease Modeling, whose job it is to track the spread of disease in hopes of predicting the future spread and cutting it off quickly - they are working closely with the Gates Foundation and others. They tell me that it all hinges on how willing we are to put our lives on hold for the foreseeable future and limit contact with others. If we can keep this thing from breaking out too rapidly and stay ahead of our resources (ventilators, PPE, and such), we stand a chance to be in some kind of control.
Wash your hands. Stay home when you're sick. Call your doctor and maybe even get tested if you are exhibiting those well-published symptoms or have had contact with someone who has it. Stay 6 feet away from others when you do go out. Send only one family member to the grocery store; don't make it a family outing. Buy only what you need so that there's enough for all. Go to the park, a trail, the ocean; get outside with your kids and/or pets. I saw on Facebook that one friend had gone hiking with her friends, arriving in separate cars and staying 6 feet apart on the trail!
Please, please, please! For the sake of those who can't fight this thing, please isolate. I get it if you can't work from home and need to pay your bills and buy food for your family. But there are still precautions you can take. And if you do have to go out please stay away from your high-risk relatives. You can deliver groceries and such without contact, and you can speak on the phone or video chat.
And most of all: THANK YOU to those who are keeping our infrastructure going. Who are putting their lives on the line every day to make sure others survive. To the nurses and doctors, the janitors, truckers, grocery store stockers, order pickers, and clerks, the emergency services workers, and all of the others who are keeping us going during these times. I don't know where the line is between safety and self-sacrifice; that's something for each of you to decide for yourselves. But I am so very grateful.
To those who have lost their jobs because of this and are in fear for their families, I am so very sorry and I am praying for you. I wish I could take each of you into my home and help you through this, but the only tool I have right now is prayer.
Speaking of taking people in, if you are high-risk and need to be isolated and are having trouble because family members have to go out and about, I'm just going to put this out there: if you can find some way to isolate for 2 or 3 weeks (so that I can be safe), I have space for two more people at my apartment. Yes, we'd be crowded. Yes, there'd have to be bed-sharing and couch-sleeping. But my apartment is fairly roomy, and you would be safe. Drop me a line and we'll talk. I don't even know how this would work, but there it is.
As for myself, I read a lot on Kindle Unlimited. I am watching all 5 seasons of China Beach on DVD, and have all of the Star Trek movies in line, as well as a couple other favorites, CBS All Access (Hawaii Five-0, NCIS, All Rise, Star Trek: Picard), and Hulu (Property Brothers and Fixer Upper). I have a puzzle I've started working on, a map of Disneyland that i'm looking forward to finishing. I am crocheting a blanket for Beth. I talk on the phone and video chat. I cook and freeze meals for later. I actually clean my house (True Confessions: it's been a difficult couple of years up until now, having the energy to clean thoroughly). I get the laundry done. I work from home. I have my painting supplies at the ready, and plenty of tutorials to work from. I read my Bible. I pray a LOT for all of you out there in the world. I go for drives, because sometimes I need to get OUT, and gas stations are easy for social distancing. I open my windows and air out my apartment any time it's over 55 degrees outside. I try not to think about what the future may look like. And I sing. I'm almost ready to break out the Karaoke machine and start singing my way through all of my CDs. (You don't want to know how many that is...don't worry I will be respectful of my neighbors).
I trust that God has my back through all of this and although I may be afraid sometimes, He tells me there is no need. 365 times in the Bible He tells me DO NOT FEAR. Daily I put my future in His hands. "I may not know what the future holds, but I know Who holds the future."
God bless you all and keep you.
I love you,
Sharon
